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Proposed Summer 2019 Trip


Saturday 11th May to Sunday 19th May

Suggestions so far are either Croatia or Portugal. Prez pereferring Croatia, Montenegro, Bosnia circuit. 'Pie Shagger' is required to arrange a properly reliable touring bike if considering this trip!

No more burnt out fuses, flat batteries or bikes that burst into flames! By direct order of Il Presidente

Belgium and Luxembourg Jaunt 2018

Eurostar On fire Spa Eurostar On fire Eurostar


Shuttle from Folkstone to Calais on Friday 12th October 2018, returning Monday 15th October. 6 started out, 1 retired early when bike burst into flames !! and 5 completed the task.

Quick blast out for first overnight stop in Spa and then hoping for some good weather to find some great roads through the Ardennes in Belgium and Luxembourg.

'Pie Shagger's pristine Paul Smart Ducati 900 bursts into flames and stops M25 traffic for a while after returning from Folkstone with flat battery issues!

A pleasant warm autumn evening was spent in Spa where the local bandsmen provided an exciting dash of local colour. Several bottles of fine red wine were quaffed not to mention a number of 'Wife Beaters'.

However on Saturday 'Hands Off' had booked a complete shithole by a motorway somewhere west of Luxembourg, where we were served sumptuous microwaved food by a dwarf.

In the end it was all to much for 'Hands Off'and he was left for dead on the roadside.


On fire

It is believed Sunday night was spent in Leuven at the elegant Hotel Maritn's Klooster although there is no photographic evidence to prove it! Although that could be it with the lonesome Stella sitting outside.

An excellent weekend with some great riding in warm dry conditions with beautiful blue, sunny European skies.

Los Cojones 'Italian Job' Tour 2018

Los Cojones 'Italian Job' Tour 2018

The 'Italian Job' Tour 2018 kicks off on Wednesday 6th June and as usual Road Master has devised a superb route out through France and Switzerland to Corvara in the Italian Dolomites for a round trip of around 2400 miles. Excitement is mounting!

(Day1) Wednesday 6th June 5 of us take the Eurotunnel and head to Metz for our first night at Mercure Metz Centre.

(Day 2) We move on to Lucern passing through the scenic Vosges region and stay at Hotel Monopol.

(Day 3) Next stop St. Moritz where we stay two nights and are joined by the 3 flying out to Geneva. We follow the Klausen and Splügen passes on the way staying at Hotel Reine Victoria

(Day 4) We take in the Flüela, Umbrail and Livigno passes returing to St. Moritz.

(Day 5) We head out for Hotel Kolfuschgerhof in Corvara where we spend 3 nights, negociating the Baracche Del Braulio on the way.

(Day 6) Exploring the area including the Giau and San Boldo passes as well as the scenic Lago del Mis.

(Day 7) Another day exploring the area including the San Pellegrino and Rolle passes in the San Martino di Castrozza area.

(Day 8) Leaving Corvara we move on to Hotel Seehof in Davos for the night taking in the Flüela pass along the way.

(Day 9) From Davos 4 of us move on to the charming medieval town of Colmar staying at Hostellerie Le Marechal, while others go further into deepest Eastern Europe for an extended tour.

(Day 10) From Colmar we head to Sedan for our last night of a fab tour staying at the historic Hôtel Le Château Fort.

(Day 11) Sees us back home by Calais/Folkstone Eurotunnel.

Tuesday 19th December - Christmas dinner 2017

Hermanos Perez

Il Presidente requests the pleasure of your company on Tuesday 19th December at The Red Lion for the Annual Christmas Dinner and renewal of vows.

Non attendance will be seen as serious disrespect and miscreants will suffer consequences matching the misdemeanor including loss of club priviledges.

Meet promptly at 7:00 pm for dinner at 7:30 pm.

Rough draft new route (Calais to Corvara)

Draft Switzerland & Italy section

Change of Plan @ The Bike Shed (Sat 25th Nov)

Bike Shed Stelvio

Four of the brothers rolled on down to The Bike Shed for Saturday brunch and over the Full Bike Shed Breakfast some discussion of Summer Tour 2018 followed.

It turns out that our dates conflict with the Tour de Suisse cycling event running from Saturday June 9th to Sunday June 17th (daily stage dates). There will be significant road closures in the area and it seems a major rethink of the route is needed. The suggestion is that we might head more towards Northern Italy where we could take in the legendary (60 hairpins!) Stelvio Pass.

'Route Master' is working on a revised itinerary. Watch this space!

Rough draft new route (Calais to Corvara)

Draft Switzerland & Italy section

Club meeting Wednesday 1st November

The Hermanos Cojones assembled at the Bridge for liquid lubrication prior to continued discussions at the Spice of Night the favoured curry house.

new logo

The main topic under discussion was the Summer Tour 2018. There was enthusiasm for an Alpine destination offering some stunning mountain pass roads and beautiful scenery. A two centre option was put forward spending three days in one (possibly Andermatt, Switzerland) and two in another where the bikes can be unfettered and luggage free for some awesome riding. 'Road Master' is working on the plan and 'Black Sheep' will be keen to investigate accommodation options.

Some riders may prefer to ship their bikes out to somewhere like Geneva and options for this are being investigated. Others showed a preference for riding out from the UK perhaps adding a couple of days at either end of the trip.

There was some discussion of a potential new logo with a view to developing some custom clothing. Also some discussion of charity involvement with as yet inconclusive results.

Wednesday 1st November 2017 - Club meeting

Andermatt Hotel

To discuss plans for the Cojones summer tour 2018. Saturday 9th June to Saturday 16th June has been suggested and agreed as a good time for all.

The favoured plan is to aim for an Alpine centre, possibly Andermatt Switzerland and take daily rides hoping most passes will be open by this time of year .

No Knees & Rev have stayed in this simple but comfortable Alpine chalet style Hotel. It is bike friendly and has a garage. Many other hotels of all standards in the area. Early booking for hotels is recommended (essential) as Andermatt is something of a bikers Mecca!

Alpenpässen Website

Alpine passes PDF download

Touring map PDF download

Also under discussion: Club logo and charity support.

Autumn trip to Belgium and Luxembourg

Leaving by Le Shuttle from Folkstone to Calais on Friday 29th September 2017 and returning Monday 2nd October.

Arrived at Calais around 12:30 and headed straight out in good weather on the motorway A16 towards Ostend and then on E40 past Brussels and Liége to arrive at our hotel in Spa at 5:00 pm.

Saturday turned out to be the wet day as Andy lead us out to some scenic roads in the beautiful Ardennes. Total concentration required as a layer of wet leaves had annoyingly accumulated right in the breaking zone and through some tricky sweeping corners. We pressed on at a good pace and despite the odd twitch and slide arrived unscathed in Luxembourg having had an invigorating day.

Sunday started misty so vision was poor for the first part of the morning as we headed back into the Ardennes in Luxembourg, Germany and finally back into Belgium. It was not long before the sun came out and we experienced some of the most perfect dry well surfaced roads with sweeping left and right turns for mile after mile. Broad grins all round!

Our last night was spent in Leuven which boasts some fine medieval architecture as well as importantly being the home of Stella Artois!

On Monday that just left us with a quick blast back to Calais for the Shuttle and up the M20 for home by 5:00 pm.

Short, sweet and thoroughly enjoyed by all!

Thursday 13th July 2017 - Club meeting

Meeting at the Coach & Horses to discuss plans for 2018. The week from Saturday 9th June to Saturday 16th June was suggested and agreed as a good time for all.

The favoured plan is to aim for an Alpine centre and take daily rides out to the passes from there hoping that by this time of year most passes will be open.

Navidad 2016

Feliz Navidad hermanos Perez y buena montar en 2017

Los Cojones Bull Run 2017

Bull Run 2017

Just 6 days until Los Cojones hit the road for the Bull Run 2017 and the excitement is mounting.

'Road Master' has finalised a superb scenic route with overnight stops at the cities listed in the itinerary below. The Pyrenean section, taking in Andorra, is looking magnificent! España aquí venimos.

Bull Run Route (pdf)

Los Cojones Bull Run 2017

Friday 12/05/2017 Portsmouth Holiday Inn Express
Saturday 13/05/2017 Nantes Sozo Hotel Centre Gare
Sunday 14/05/2017 Bordeaux Pullman Bordeaux Lac
Monday 15/05/2017 Pamplona Gran Hotel La Perla
Tuesday 16/05/2017 Tramacastilla de Tena Hotel & Spa El Privilegio
Wednesday 17/05/2017 Andorra Andorra Park Hotel
Thursday 18/05/2017 Lourdes Grand Hôtel Gallia & Londres
Friday 19/05/2017 Cognac Hôtel François Premier Cognac Centre
Saturday 20/05/2017 Rennes Balthazar Hotel & Spa

Brittany Ferries
Portsmouth to Cherbourg Saturday 13 May 2017 – 09.00 (arrive 13.00)
Cherbourg to Portsmouth Sunday 21 May 2017 – 17.00 (arrive 19.00)

Bull Run Route (pdf)

Thursday 2nd February 2017 - Club meeting

New Year meeting at the Perro Marrón. Current business and discussion of upcoming Cojones Pyrenees tour in May. Viva Espana.

Meet at 7:15 pm Chez Prez for dinner at 7:30 pm.

Navidad 2016

Feliz Navidad hermanos Perez y buena montar en 2017

Christmas dinner - on the night

On arrival we were greeted by live Christmas carols with many joining in the singing at the table.

No Christmas jumpers were present.

Some good natured disappointment was voiced at the non-appearance of No Knees.

Further discussion of commercial viability of a West London Bike Shed

Sadly Road Master received an urgent call during dinner from a family member and had to leave immediately to offer support.

Followed by an introspective discussion from Prez, Rev, Hands Off and Sergeant at Arms on death to end the evening on a rather somber note.


No Knees later received a severe reprimand from Rev Rupert for his misdemeanor.

Tuesday 20th December 2016 - Christmas dinner

Hermanos Perez

Il Presidente requests the pleasure of your company on Tuesday 20th December at The Olympic Members Restaurant for the Annual Dinner and Oath of Allegiance.

Non attendance will be seen as serious disrespect and miscreants will suffer consequences matching the misdemeanor including loss of club priviledges.

Meet at 7:45 pm for dinner at 8:15 pm.


Wednesday 16th November 2016 - Club meeting



By order of Prez Des Perez, Los Cojones were called to a meeting at the Club's favoured curry house on Wednesday 16th November to consider the proposed club T-shirt designed and produced by Road Master Andy Perez.

There was a near full attendance with the exception of Mike 'Black Sheep' Perez who was unavoidably detained with urgent choir practice commitments.

Members were uniformly impressed with the detail and quality of the T-shirt and unanimously agreed it should be adopted.